A funny thing happend on the way.....

This Kid cracks me up!

Sofie and I have many adventures together. We had a great one on Saturday. She and I walked to a little park about 3/4 of a mile from our apartment. I pushed her in the jogger stroller, then while we where there she played and I did some circut training and got some exercise. Then after about and hour or more we packed up and walked home, trudged up the three flights of stairs to our apartment and I realized I didn't have my keys. So back down we went to retrace our steps to the park, along with a panicked call to my poor husband letting him know he may have to leave work to come let us in.

About half way back to the park Sofie says to me "I know where your keys are momma". Yeah right! So I indulge her and ask her how she knows. She tells me "I took them to play hide and seek" and I then remember that she said she wanted to play hide and seek while we were there but being the parent that I am, it went in one ear and out the other. Maybe we are on to something here. Now if only she really does remember where they are. She tells me they are by the slide at the park. Um, ok! So we get there and sure enough, Sofie jumps out of the jogger and goes right over to my keys laying in the dirt under the slide. Thank God! That would have been a bad deal. Note to self: Don't leave your keys where your toddler can get to them while at a park or any other open space! Then we walk all the way back to the apartment and trudge up those blasted three flights of stairs. Oh well, I needed the extra exercise I guess.

I have one more funny parent moment to share. Sunday morning as my husband was getting out of the shower our daughter who is almost 3 years old walked into the bathroom. She has seen our husband naked about a million times by now mind you. She looks at Ken and says "Gross Daddy, your vagina is ugly". We both got a good laugh from that one, then realized it was time to explain that only girls have vaginas and boys have a penis and that is why it looks different. She stared at us with a blank look on her face so I am sure this went right over her head, but hey we had to try anyway right. Well we then decided it may be getting close to time for Daddy to keep his privates private! What a funny thing for a kid to say though!

As much as parenting frustrates and tires me it also gives many moments like these. It helps me realize that God really does have a sense of humor and he has instilled it in little kids.

Oh Poopy

Potty training is so frustrating. It has taken a very long time to get Sofie to the point of using the toilet to pee. Lots of treats and lots of praise. Not to mention keeping her potty chair (or potty train as I used to call it) in the living room so she would watch cartoons and thereby stay on the potty long enough to actually pee. Now she uses the "big girl" toilet almost every time she has to go pee unless the little one is handy then she wants that. Now poop on the other hand; what a trail by fire. Unless I keep her naked all day every day and never leave the house, she WILL NOT poop on the toilet. It makes me absolutely crazy and is totally unreasonable to do. I know, I know, patience and all that but have you ever had to clean up a massive chunk of 2 year old poop that has been smushed up and in every crevice possible in addition to covering every square inch of pull up? Well I have and it's sooooo nasty! I just have to say it. It is gross and yucky and stinky and grody! I love my daughter with all my heart and soul but I do not enjoy cleaning up her poop anymore. It is too smelly and too chunky and just too much!

Today for example. We went to a bible study and then to McDonalds with some other moms and kids. Sofie had to pee so I took her to the bathroom and she was farting(in toddler land that is a direct indicator of an impending storm). So I asked her if she had to poop and got the same answer I always get; "NO". Ok. We eat, head out to the playland (it's outside in the great state of Florida) and she plays for about 30 or 40 minutes. Mind you, we are outside so breezes and all that dissipate many smells. As we leave, the other two moms and I smell something. Everyone does a poop check and it is my daughter of course. The poop is everywhere it can be inside that pull up. It is literally smashed into a poop pancake due to repeated trips down the slides. I have no wipes and we are about 20 minutes from home. Well being the kind of mom I am I told her she would just have to sit in her poop until we got home. The car ride was very fragrant and made me wish with all my being I had some wipes(correction of errors for future trips). To make matters more interesting, Sofie falls asleep in the car and I have to carry her up 3 flights of stairs all the while smashing the poop even flatter. Let me tell you, smashed poop smells even worse than unsmashed poop. Try it some time and then tell me if I'm not right. I bet you will agree. Poop turns into cement when it has been attached to the skin for more than a few minutes. I just about needed steel wool to clean her up. Then of course she wakes up and nap time is over. So thats the story of my life right now. Poopy pants and short naps.

But I would not trade it for anything. Sofie is the light of my life and the one good true thing I have ever done. The one thing I have done complelety right and I love that kid with all the love God has given me.

I have demon problem

Today started off like any other day. My sweet adorable happy daughter woke up. A little earlier that normal I must say but awake and acting completely normal. Then by about 10 am she became possesed by a demon. A crabby, contrary, snotty, obstinate demon who likes to stick it's tongue out and go "phsssspt". I took this demon to Target and it was the worst hour of my week so far. Thank God it's the start of the week because it can only get better from here right? Or is that too optimistic? I suppose it could also get worse.

Now I am not a spanker. I do not believe in spanking or slapping or violence against a child in any form or for any excuse BUT I was very close to overlooking that personal belief and as the mom in Everybody Hates Chris says "I will knock you into last night". I thought better of this when I remembered that I was dealing with a demon and that may only anger it and spur it on to greater feats of naughtiness. So I chose the higher ground and ignored this little demon's antics until the demon could no longer stand it and broke out in great heaping sobs with all kinds of ectoplasmic goo seeping out of it's nose.

We drove home in relative peace and the demon was partially excised by a 2 hour nap and some tater tots with cheese and sour cream. UNTIL.....we decided to walk over to the grocery store and buy a few things to go with dinner. Demons are tricky little things. Especially this particular imp. All through out the store I saw this thing trying to rear it's ugly head and my daughter was doing a fair job of keeping this demon under control. Then we decided to leave the store and for whatever reason the demon was able to take over her body again and I was treated to the snotty, obstinate monster that likes to stick it's tongue out. So needless to say the walk home and the 3 flight climb of stairs was not much fun.

Once again she is my sweet loving child wanting to cuddle with me on the couch. But I will have my holy water, cross and bible ready for the next time. Or I really will sell her to the gypsies!